Adoption.

requiem

Ain't nobody got time for that!
Staff member
Administrator
#1
Some here know... A handful of you know me personally from years back....

My wife and I are adopting internationally. We're in the 2nd phase just before our info goes overseas to the country we intend to adopt from. It's been a very long, rough road since we made this decision back in October of last year. We've had to go through 2 background checks (and one more coming), mountains of paperwork, multiple interviews, and a wide open door into our personal lives ... so an orphan can have a home. We got our state approval. We're going to be getting USCIS approval in a few weeks then we need Ukraine to give us the thumbs up.

I won't lie, it's stupid expensive. 2% of couples who want to adopt do - with the cost being the biggest deterrent.

We feel led to do so, and are stepping out in doing it. I've put many projects on my homestead aside for a year, pushed off some large purchases (pickup was the exception) and curtailed a lot of spending.

We're working to get as much funding saved up as possible to keep the amount we need to borrow for this to a minimum.
Please keep us in your prayers as we work towards this. If you want to help us financially, send me a PM.

We did design patches and drive 100% of the proceeds to the fund:
https://144-1.com/products/welcome-home-patch

Got questions? Thinking about doing this? Ask away.
 
#2
Let us know how it goes. I have seen some folks have success from SE Asia, while others have only had success in China. Had a friend do a few trips to get 2 from Ireland, only for it to fall through during the pick-up.

It is awesome to see you doing it.
 

requiem

Ain't nobody got time for that!
Staff member
Administrator
#3
Let us know how it goes. I have seen some folks have success from SE Asia, while others have only had success in China. Had a friend do a few trips to get 2 from Ireland, only for it to fall through during the pick-up.

It is awesome to see you doing it.
Oh, y'all will know. It's a big gamble indeed but if we can give a kid a home, it's worth it to us.
 
#5
Op, you and your wife have big hearts, and I truly hope this works out for you, and your new family addition brings you much joy and happiness.

That being said, I will admit that I don't think I have it in me to take such a huge leap of faith.

For those of us who have kids, you really do realize that you would do anything for them, and even with their little human flaws, love them as they are.

I have only limited first hand knowledge of foreign adoptions; I personally have known 2 couples who adopted asian girls (apparently orphans because their parents gave them up because of the asian preference for boys - this was and has been very common while China enforced the "one child" policy (not sure if it's still in effect. Because of this, most of the children were perfectly healthy, and more often than not thrived in their new western homes, excelling at school, etc.

I also knew a couple who adopted a boy from one of the former Soviet/Russian states. He was a bit older, I want to say 4 or 5 years old. They went through the same lengthy screening process you are going through, etc. Unfortunately, once they got their new son home, they discovered he had severe behavioral problems. Almost burned their house down. Attacked their other children. Very slow in preschool/school. Fell out of contact with them and not sure how things turned out. I have read that many eastern european children have issues due to either being the offspring of a drug addicted mother (meth and "croc" I believe are a very big problem in these countries), and that the orphanages there are basically warehouses, with little to no nurturing of children, so in those crucial first few years they miss out on developing basic human social skills.

Not trying to frighten you, but if you haven't looked very thoroughly into your choice, thought it might be useful information.

Best wishes and keep us posted.
 

requiem

Ain't nobody got time for that!
Staff member
Administrator
#6
Out of curiosity..Why all of these foreign adoptions? None available here?
Lots domestically for sure but we feel led towards Ukraine. Rolling with that.

Op, you and your wife have big hearts, and I truly hope this works out for you, and your new family addition brings you much joy and happiness.

That being said, I will admit that I don't think I have it in me to take such a huge leap of faith.

For those of us who have kids, you really do realize that you would do anything for them, and even with their little human flaws, love them as they are.

I have only limited first hand knowledge of foreign adoptions; I personally have known 2 couples who adopted asian girls (apparently orphans because their parents gave them up because of the asian preference for boys - this was and has been very common while China enforced the "one child" policy (not sure if it's still in effect. Because of this, most of the children were perfectly healthy, and more often than not thrived in their new western homes, excelling at school, etc.

I also knew a couple who adopted a boy from one of the former Soviet/Russian states. He was a bit older, I want to say 4 or 5 years old. They went through the same lengthy screening process you are going through, etc. Unfortunately, once they got their new son home, they discovered he had severe behavioral problems. Almost burned their house down. Attacked their other children. Very slow in preschool/school. Fell out of contact with them and not sure how things turned out. I have read that many eastern european children have issues due to either being the offspring of a drug addicted mother (meth and "croc" I believe are a very big problem in these countries), and that the orphanages there are basically warehouses, with little to no nurturing of children, so in those crucial first few years they miss out on developing basic human social skills.

Not trying to frighten you, but if you haven't looked very thoroughly into your choice, thought it might be useful information.

Best wishes and keep us posted.
Believe me - we’ve had to endure all sorts of training etc on this and have heard the stories. It can keep u up at night.

We have a specific child in mind and pray we’re led to her.

As for behavioral, fetal alcohol syndrome is common as well as delays.

We just pray and move forward.
 

requiem

Ain't nobody got time for that!
Staff member
Administrator
#10
My wife and I have been taking about adoption. I've heard of ballpark figures for it, mind giving me an idea what you guys have spent?
as of right now roughly 5K. the big chunk is when we head overseas. that's really what we're trying to raise funds with via gofundme, patches, etc.
 

Makulit

Very Active Member
#13
Lots of Respect for you. I've always thought adopting and giving a child a home is a gift nobody could match.
We're trying to get pregnant for the second time. Wife and I have discussed adopting. At this point my wife is against it, thinks she would be too biasd toward our son.

One of my coworkers, was told by her Dr she couldn't have kids (her and husband are sever diabetics). So she tried adopting from the Philippines twice. She's a Filipina and tried adopting from the province she grew up in, But as soon as the locals found out she was adopting from the U.S., the price went to over $50k. So both fell through. In the End God blessed them with their own child. She thought she was sick for 5 months. See God does still do Miracles
 
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